Friday, October 31, 2014

FB Question/Inquiry: Not Mapping Out Life

FB Question/Inquiry: Not having things mapped out in Life…and that’s OK.

Harmuny’s World Answer:

 Mapping out our life is a great way to stay connected to and focused on the ultimate goals we would like to accomplish in Life. Vision Boards, photos, writings, and other things that visually show us what we want out of life is healthy for guidance. Be it that Life is bigger than we can imagine, we are challenged to live selflessly in pretty much all that we do.

Leaving a legacy for generations of your family as well as others in the world, a few big names may come to mind. The everyday survival on earth is a challenge for all with obstacles that come and go. To individualize this topic, I understand, mentioned by Sex and the City cast not sure which one said it but they mentioned the twenties are an area of exploration. Obviously that stuck with me because that was said a few years back. But at any age you can be lost. Food for thought: “What you believe happens.”

Moving forward... Having supportive family and friends during a time of ‘where do I belong’ is important. I heard the saying: “Write a plan and give it to God so He can erase it.” That can be seen more than one way. 1. Your plan could be vague so God fill in those transitions. 2. You don’t believe the things you wrote so you have zero intention of accomplishing what you claim to set out to do. 3. You write a thorough plan and God sees where you want to go and it lines up NOWHERE to where He needs you to be (your plan may have been selfish). I can keep this going…
I love to share with others, “We are here to tell someone else’s story/message”. Have you seen the movie Sucker Punch? If not, I would encourage you to watch, I think it is an 18 and older film,  so look into it before sitting with youth to watch it. Then you will understand this paragraph.

What is a journey?
An act of traveling from one place to another
What is a destination?
The place to which someone or something is going or being sent
What is the right path to get to your destination?
You may or may not know this answer right away, guidance always come on time.
What is a map?
No kidding I chose Google to define this and it has: a person’s face.
But to be politically correct: A diagrammatic representation of an area of land or sea showing physical features, cities, roads, etc.

This is some great stuff here, but to tie a nice bow around this gathered information. Every last one of us are completely and uniquely created to do unique activities and have unique accomplishments and face unique trials/failures. How something affects or effects one person it will be similar to some but not exactly the same.

Tragedy, Love, Work Ethic, Eating, Entertainments are all reacted to differently, similar but not the same, think finger prints even go to DNA. Each of our make-up is different!
So I assure you our paths will echo that, how we see life will assimilate that and our trials will shape that.

Not knowing what you need to do or where you are going is totally fine. Don’t celebrate just yet, sitting doing nothing that is exactly where you are going, nowhere.
It is not okay to watch other’s lives and think you are going somewhere if you or someone before you has not made sacrifices to get you or them there.
People that are somewhere worked, if not them, then someone.

This is not a case of being grateful or ungrateful, it is about starting somewhere and ending up somewhere better than you were before you started and helping others along the way.
I could stop here but there is more…

Life has a way of bringing you back where you started. What I like to do is look at what I have done/been through, accomplished, failed at, and what I care about. I start there; my story will not be like yours. We all have a story also known as our journey. Some stories are longer than others.

You use what you have to get what you want has been used in many ways. I want to use it as you are wonderfully and uniquely made, start today on your homework to discover your cares and where you belong and where you want to go. It will take spending time with ourselves; some of us with all this technology cannot stand to be alone let alone with ourselves. But try it and see. Being stuck or lost is not all that people credit it to be.

Below are Bible verses to assist in your Journey. So far on my journey my favorite verse has been Joshua 1:9. You must look that one up yourself, it’s so worth it! J Cheers

Habakkuk 2:2
He Lord answered me: Write down this vision; clearly inscribe it on tablets so one may easily read it.

Proverbs 3:5&6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.

James 1:8
A double Minded Man is unstable in all his ways.

P.S. I did not get dressed up to write this! 

Monday, October 27, 2014

FB Question: Keeping Your Guard Up

Question from FB:

Why do women keep their guard up for so long and pull away when men start to catch feelings?

Harmuny's World Answer: 

Every case is different. People don't want to take the risk of being hurt. You hear life is pain, but there is a balance to everything. She may have baggage that she doesn't trust you with, so before the guy gets too comfortable she pulls away. We all tend to overlook venerability when it comes down to relationships. Think about it, if the ultimate goal of talking to someone isn't marriage then what are you all doing, wasting time?

A. Keeping the Guard up
When you let someone in your life, a lot happens. Have you heard what you do affects everyone else around you? Rather positive or negative, things change. It is vital that some type of guard is kept up because we don't want a lot of broken people walking around. I don't want to get too deep in section A, but humans are fickle, we all look to fill a void that we think is in someone else. Agree? Breaking that down: we crave to be craved. 

B. Baggage
Over time in each of our lives we have certain things that cling to us or we cling to. A home, parents, vehicle(s) siblings, other family members, a boat, debt, previous relationship(s) that didn't work, memories, childhood, there could be numerous of things people are captured by. We are either running from something or to something at one time or another. Possibly children from a previous something and now you have to find someone who you trust to protect and appreciate them as well as you. When we decide to talk to someone we sign up to help unpack things seen and unseen. We all have baggage. That is why being mature when getting involved with anyone is important. We all are at different stages in life and those who find an equal are blessed.

C. Catching Feelings
I chose to sum up this "catching feelings" as having an attraction, I won't name a specific attraction because as you read this you will apply your own and yes there are a few. The key word here is "feelings". We are emotional and to not get all scientific we end up on an emotional roller coaster when it comes down to relationships. Attraction is a gift; it can be related to confidence which is something that must be worn well. So this catching feeling, I hear is getting to know someone surface based. At the beginning people naturally do the crazy check, Making sure the person is sane first and then what issues they are currently facing, then the attraction may go a little deeper once you get past the associate stage. Liking someone and claiming someone is totally different. THE GAME! It can be annoying the whole thing of be the player or get played. But that is a youthful (as in immature) topic and one I won't cover in this blog.

D. Getting Comfortable
Allowing someone in is like the fight of life, for some. Once on a steady something, whatever people call it these days getting comfortable can be a task or smooth sailing. You meet family, you meet friends, you share secrets, you share struggles, and you still may only be scratching the surface. You look into spirituality or how you plan to build family morals and values play a huge part in getting comfortable. You take advice from each other and you look to each other to have answers the other may or may not have. This is an area to grow together where you also discover who and what you are becoming rather positive or negative. The saying show me who your friends are and I'll show you who you are. You are friends in the getting comfortable stage.

E. Trust
I chose to add trust in this topic because it is a make or break in the initial topic of why women run when there is an opportunity to settle. Side note: Men have commitment issues too. Maybe the individual woke up and realized before they got too deep where things were heading and they ran for the nearest exit. If you don't trust someone let it go (my opinion if you all are not married) (Married folk must seek God about their relationship as well as single, but your bond {married folk} is not in a position to walk away you have a lot more at stake). Touchy topic but trust these days is what each individual makes it. The bible says put your trust in God. From my personal experience, I pray, if someone I talk to act up, no worries, tough cookie!!! If I act up, I would hope the same. We all are a work in progress.

I will conclude there! There is a lot more I can cover on this topic
but I will hold off for now, let me know if I answered the question and kept it unbiased. Feel free to comment and share constructive criticism.

I could add a few Bible verses just to help put things into perspective or you can comment and share scripture.